Nothing irritates me more than inconsistency.

At the top of that list is the rate at which I communicate with a guy.

• How long is it usually between conversations? A day? A few days? A week?

• How long does it take for him to respond to a call or a text? I think 24 hrs is more than enough time, and anything over 48 hours is just ridiculous.

And they always have a great excuse as to why they couldn’t call back, or why you haven’t heard from them. In short, something else was more important, and we’re just supposed to accept that. But is it REALLY that taxing to send a quick, “Hey, I’m breathing,” cuz that’s usually where I go next. Before I get too mad, I wonder if he’s not responding because he’s hurt and can’t do so.

95% of the time, thats not the case.

So what’s a reasonable or tolerable call back time? Perhaps my expectations are unreasonable.

And I’m not talkin’ about a guy you met a week ago. I’m talkin about guy you met 3 months ago, and its been expressed (by HIM, no doubt) that there’s more to this courtship than just passing the time away, and he wants to see where this could go.

If he stops steadily communicating with you, is it a sign that “he’s just not that into you?”

 

I think it is.

This is SHESOPINIONATED.com,
and everyone is entitled to my opinion.

 

6 comments

Hey sexy lady
It was nice to know ya
(it was nice to know ya)
But I gotta move ooonnnnn
Oooonnnnn

I found an apartment!

I wanted to share the news with you all.

 

 

 

yaymen.

I can’t leave ‘em alone
I tried that good boy game
But the dope boy’s turning me on

I hear you Ciara. But you can’t date a dope boy, you can only have sex with him.

Keep you a good boy in the mix.

word.

This is SHESOPINIONATED.com,
and everyone is entitled to my opinion.

 

1 comment

Kill or be killed.

Damn, is that what the dating scene has become?

I recently watched this radio interview given by Karrine Steffans, and she broke down her dating style and how she gets down.

Allow me to state for the record that I like Karrine. I respect her gangsta, and I ain’t mad at it.

But it ain’t me. And perhaps, its because of the life she’s led that she dates this way. I don’t wanna move through dating like its a game of chess - anticipating my opponents moves before he makes them, and then counteracting with moves of my own. I don’t have a strategy lined up, but shit, maybe I need one.

Karrine likens the way she deals with her roster of men to having “kids”. Matter of fact, she calls them her “kids”. She lets them know when they’re out of order, she lets them know when they move up or down on her list, she doesn’t allow certain privileges to those at the bottom of the list, while those at the top of the list have more access to her time and attention, she’s got rules and guidelines for them, and generates mini-competition between the men to keep them all on their toes. And because she’s the bad bitch that she is, they stay around.

See, I already know that won’t work for me,
cuz I don’t do the kid thing.

I guess I make moves and plans in other aspects of my life……perhaps I should apply them to dating. But I’m not for keepin someone else’s grown kids in line. I don’t even wanna deal with my own.

So, what’s my dating style?

*crickets*

HellifIknow! I’ve tried on a few dating styles since I’ve been in NY. I tried to gather a roster of men that I could rotate, so I wouldn’t get bored or be without company when I wanted/needed it. Yeah, that sorta thing only works if you have an ACTIVE roster of men. It defeats the purpose if only one man at a time decides to be active.

So I guess I’m a one-on-one kind of dater. I’d love to date a multitude of men at once, but I guess I don’t manage em right, cuz I always end up with just one.

How DO I manage ‘em? Shit, I don’t. I just let them do them, and I (try to) maintain doin’ me. Maybe thats not right. Maybe I need to manipulate the situation more in my favor. Yeah, coercion ain’t my specialty, so I’ll leave that to someone else.

what’s your dating style?

This is SHESOPINIONATED.com,
and everyone is entitled to my opinion.

 

7 comments

It ain’t none of your business.

What about secrets WITHIN the relationship?

I’ve been involved with a person who was/is so secretive……it’s scary. Namely because, I didn’t understand why. How bad could this secret be? And who am I that you’d have to keep me out the loop?

That led me to believe that he was involved in some bullshit that either he specifically didn’t want me to know about (some ol’ sneaky “on the side” shit), or something that I really shouldn’t know about because it could “hurt” me or maybe incriminate me in some way.

Ok, so what does that mean for our relationship, if you have that kind of secret that you’re keeping from me? If you’re involved in something of that magnitude that you can’t be open with me, perhaps I need to keep you at a distance.

And to make matters worse, he’s HORRIBLE at keeping secrets. If the secret is that serious, then I shouldn’t even know about the secret to begin with. I shouldn’t even know that you have something to keep from me.

Believe me, I don’t allude to ANYTHING that I don’t want others to be aware of. You won’t even know that there’s something I don’t want you to know about.

**********************************************************************************************

But ummm, yeah. Enough about me, lol.

Can a relationship tolerate secrets?? If so, to what extent?

Have you ever got the feeling that your lover was keeping something from you??

Did you investigate further? Were you right? How’d you find out??

Or was your instinct enough to get you movin’ in the other direction?

How free flowing is YOUR information in a relationship?

Are you an open book? Or do you keep a lock on it?

 
In a casual relationship, do you ever admit to seeing other people? Has a mate ever admitted it to you?

What was the end result? Could you handle it? Could they handle it?

are some things better left unsaid?

This is SHESOPINIONATED.com,
and everyone is entitled to my opinion.

 

6 comments