Ok, I really need me a blackberry or somethin so I can blog on the go, cuz I always come across blog-worthy items…but by the time I get to my computer to type a post, I dun forgot ‘em all. ARGH!

 
But I went to Toronto last week (for work), and it was a real experience (I wonder if they’re lazy with the pronunciation of “Toronto” like ATLiens are with pronouncing “Atlanta” - oh, I mean Atlanna). One of my co-workers in the Canadian office was kind enough to take me out for the one night I was in town, we checked out downtown (which looked just like Times Square) and we ate some GREAT Mongolian BBQ.

 

So how bout, we went to the bathroom before we left, and……homegirl had the bubble guts like what……and she wasn’t shy about it! Now I know, when you gotta go, you gotta go…but damn. I didn’t need to be exposed to all that.

 
But yo, I can’t tell you how many times I left a bathroom stall without flushing. I’m so used to the auto flushers, that I don’t even think about it. Yeah, had to turn around and go back a couple times when I didn’t hear the “swoosh”.

 
CUSTOMS - that was pretty deep. This was my first time really traveling internationally (cuz Tiajuana doesn’t count……I’ll never go back), so the custom’s thing was kinda new. At first when I rolled up on the man in Canada, he was real cool. Took my passport and what not (can I tell you how cool I felt having a passport? LOL, I’m a dork. Sue me!). Then he started grillin’ me.

 
“What are you here for?”

Business.

“What KIND of business?”

Ummm???

He had me stumped yall. I couldn’t remember what I was there for.

Training……market research?

 

The man was lookin at me with suspicion in his eye, and I was scurred they were gonna deport me back to the US. But then he let me through, and all was right with the world once again.

 
Then I go to get my rental car, and the man there was bothering me somethin’ awful. I guess he was tryna be “friendly” and helpful and welcome me to Canada, but I wasn’t interested. I just wanted the keys so I could get to my hotel. Then he calls himself flirting with me, asking where I’m staying, how long I’ll be in town……look dude, this is really “sweet” and all, but I’m not in the mood. Just hand me my KEYS!

 
But Toronto was aight. I think I could live there. I’d just have to get used to spending Tunies, realize that the 90 speed limit on the freeway is in Kilometers, and figure out exactly how warm is 22 degrees Celsius, lol.

 

Sidenote: I really missed seeing the pseudo BF while I was gone. And it was only overnight. Damn.

 

 

 

4 comments

 
…ummm, damn, that’s all I got, lol. Yall don’t have as many names as Detroit.

OH, speaking of Detroit–

 

So, I totally forgot to include Raheem Devaughn and Dr. Ian Smith in my highlights for Detroit. Oops! You can view them now if you click the link.

 

Anyways……I was asked to go to Houston for a work assignment. It sounded like a great opportunity, so I jumped at the chance. Ended up being a headache - my manager gave me half-ass information and left me hangin’. Being the strong, capable person that I am, I managed to pull it altogether and deliver in a major way. Yay me.

 
But the person who REALLY delivered and saved my trip was Tex in the City. She was the ULTIMATE host, and gave me the best Houston experience one could ask for. Let me tell yall, if you wanna know about Houston…where ta go, what to do…Tex knows it ALL! We had some great food and some great times, and she is the main reason I’m going back. Tex is a sweetheart, and just a wonderful person to be around. She’s got the biggest heart!! (sometimes I think she’s just too good for me) Sorry, had a Sade moment, lol. But Tex is like my sister from another mother, and I can’t wait to visit again! There’s so much more fun to be had!

I think the most memorable ummm memory was going to the Saltgrass Steakhouse to eat dinner. Chile……when Tex mentioned that we were going to “Saltgrass”, I just knew she was taking me to some green, healthy, foliage-friendly place that serves wheatgrass appetizers, and sprout salad entrees. I’m thinkin, “I know I’m a vegetarian and all, but I don’t eat that shit. PLEASE don’t take me there!” Is it wrong that I was thrilled when I saw it was a Steakhouse? LOL

We were served by an adorable waiter (what was he, 22?) who was originally from Brooklyn, and was steadily gettin’ his flirt on wit ya girl. Tee hee.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Then I decided to let my eyes wander around the restaurant, as I hadn’t seen more than the waiter, and I looked up from the table to see a giant buffalo head looking down upon me as I ate my bread.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Have Mercy.

Scared the shit outta me.

 
Then I turned around, and saw an equally large Longhorn watching over myself and Tex. I’d later learn that everything is large in Texas.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

As Tex would say……

Welcome to Texas!

 

 

Ok, so let me tell you why I can’t live in Houston.

 

1. THE HEAT! Oh my goodness, it was SO DAMN HOT! I mean, it gets hot and humid in NY, but the heat in Houston was different. That mess was straight off the sun. Just blazin!

   And then to counteract the heat, every building and car has their A/C on FULL blast. So in a matter of seconds you go from 100 degrees, to 50 degrees. Damn, can I get 72? Do I hear 72??? I’m still a tropical person, ya know.

    
   Ok, this next one is two-fold. Its a gift and a curse.

2. The FOOD. OMG, there were SO many restaurants, drive-thru’s, and take-outs in Houston…and they weren’t all chains and commercial franchises. Lots of local cuisines to take part of as well. I mean LOTS! Just lined up and down the streets. Everywhere you turn. Yall don’t understand, there was an unlimited supply of edibles throughout the city. No one should be hungry in Houston. NO ONE!

   And the portions…THE PORTIONS!

   Let me tell yall, I like food, ok. I love to eat. I couldn’t tell you the last time I took a doggie bag home from a restaurant. I did it twice in 2 days while visiting Houston. I mean, they pile it ON!

    
   So, yeah, while I love food and love eating, I couldn’t live in Houston, because I’d be a straight heifer! Dear God.

    

3. The strip malls! Strip malls with eateries galore. Geez, I’ve never seen so many. Seriously! Shops, upon shops, upon shops, upon shops. And good ones too! Just readily available for all to enjoy. Too many opportunities to spend my money. How can one resist such temptation??

    

4. Man, Houston is so spread out! I think I’ve been in NYC too long. Everything is so close together here, I wasn’t used to all the traveling we had to do. Hmmm, I wonder if I could re-adjust to living in the Greater L.A. area? But at least the gas is cheaper in Houston - I saw it as low as $3.69!! Heavens!

    
   And the last reason I couldn’t live in Houston (besides it not being on a coast)…

5. It was brought to my attention that there are NO 7-Elevens in Houston. NONE!

   (I feel like singing a verse from An American Tail - “cuz there are noooo cats in America…”)

   *ahem*

   Anyway, the closest one is in Austin. I gotta drive to Austin for a slurpee? Yeah, not gonna work for me.

 

 

So all in all……Houston was cool (not literally), with some cool inhabitants. I see why people dig it. But erra ummm……

 

 

 

How yall expect me to beat the heat with NO SLURPEES???

 

 

 

5 comments

 
(or whatever you wanna call it)

 

Highlights:

• Seeing my best friend.

• Handling the business of my organization (that consisted of both pleasure and pain)
• Meeting one of my best guy friends (I’ve known him for 5 years, but we’d never met)
• Greektown! Namely the casino. CHEAP/STRONG drinks……my favorite combo.
• Motown!……GREAT museum. I think we spent about 2 hrs in Hitsville, USA - just taking it all in. Thinking about all the great talent and music that was birthed in that very location……it was surreal to say the least. Definitely worth the visit, and one of the highlights of my trip.
   

• I also visited the Charles H. Wright African-American Museum (largest African-American Museum in the world). Beautiful museum. I could’ve spent hours in there, reading every piece of literature that was present. The section on slavery was the most compelling. Every Black person in America needs to see that exhibit. As many times as I hear the stories and read the tales……it never gets old and never ceases to amaze me just…how…unreal that time in our history was. But the museum makes it a VERY real experience for all who visit.

  My only criticism of the museum, was that in the later years, it focused more heavily on Detroit, and by the time I went to the museum, I had had enough of Detroit. But its inspired me to get off my ass and go see the African-American museum here in NY, and learn Black history in the city I reside in. (its a crime that I never went to the one in LA……and I lived down the street from it for YEARS…passed by it numerous times…never took my ass in *smh*)

   

• ETA: Raheem DeVaughn performance (that man is truly gifted and a joy to watch)

   

• ETA: Dr. Ian Smith’s presentation on the state of health in the Black community. Very informative, very encouraging, very inspiring, very thought-provoking. That man is on a mission to improve our quality and longevity of life, and I do believe he will succeed.

   

   

  (see, it wasn’t all negative)

   
  *ahem*

   
  And now for the……

   

  Lowlights:

  Let’s start at the very beginning……a very good place to start.

   

• The Airport…(can I even call it that?). It looked like the first airport ever. No upgrades since it opened - oh, except for the snazzy new vending machines that accept credit cards. We see where their priority lies. As Andrea so eloquently put it……the airport looked like a bus station. NOT impressed.

   

• Faygo. Anyone ever heard of it? Anyone?

  Yeah, its a drink. And a RED SODA DRINK at that (or do they call it pop?). But not strawberry, not red kool-aid……just a random red drink. With its own billboard…that they only make in Detroit. Sus-pect. (and what kinda name is that for a drink?)

   

• The demographic. *sigh* Detroit is like a wannabe urban city, but its filled with country folks who aren’t slickers. Nearly everyone there migrated from the South, and its like they never figured out how to de-countrify themselves, even though they’re supposed to be in this urban metropolis. Just con-fused!

  And they can’t dress. AT ALL! I don’t know how many fashion crimes were committed in my short time there, and yall know I ain’t no where near being a fashion guru. But some stuff should go without saying. Style is not a word that should be used anywhere near Detroit. I think it all left with Motown in the 70’s, and folks been messed up ever since. (Pictures would be MUCH more helpful, I know)

   

• The “social scene”. We got a brief glimpse of the “happenin” social scene in downtown Detroit, as we attempted to enter a club/bar/lounge near our hotel. They were charging $20 to get in, and from what I saw at the door (the folks waiting to get in)……please. Low-budget, at best. Sho wasn’t payin’ to mix and mingle with more of that. And from what I saw through the window (folks grinding on the walls to “Funky Y2C” - yeah, yall remember that song)…uh huh, I was extra cool. (what respectable DJ actually has that song in his library? And PLAYS it? And in MOTOWN? For shame!)

   

• The questionable conversation my best friend and I had with 3 local Detroit brothers (actual related brothers), originally from North Carolina. One was married (and tryna hit), one was divorced (and on lithium), one was a pimp (who thought he could sleep with us within 3 days). They were age 35 and up.

  For real??? 0 for 3.

   

• The Middle America syndrome. I can’t explain it, but there’s something off/wrong/ill about not living near a coast. And by near I mean…right up ON it!

  I felt like I was trapped, caged, enclosed in a box, or a time-warp or something. I felt restricted and detached from the rest of the world. I think living in those conditions distorts and limits the minds of its inhabitants, and thats why so many break for the edges. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again……I needs to live on a COAST. I need an ocean, a large body of water within my view so I can visually expand my horizons, and see past the remote world I know.

   

   

   

   
  And the number one reason I’m not going back to Detroit……

   

   

   

   

   

   

   

   

   

   

   

   

  ……that bum-ass MAYOR!

  

   

   

  Hi-YA!

   
  (thats me kicking Kwame’s face on the side of the Detroit People Mover)

   

   

   

   

  Oh snap, I forgot about the DPM! Well, not much to say about it. Its a $.50 ride to get you around downtown Detroit. It was cool, cuz it took us to GREEKTOWN!

   

   

   

   

   

  
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